"You are?"
"You're what?"
"Pika?"
Three surprised pairs of eyes turned on Misty one day, when she abruptly made this announcement.
"Aren't you kind of young to get married?" Brock then pointed out.
"Well, when it comes to that," replied Misty, putting down Togepi and walking over, "so is Ash."
"But I'm not getting married," said Ash.
"Oh yes, you are!" She laughed. "Because we're getting married."
"We're WHAT?" Ash started to back away. Okay, maybe he had just a little crush on Misty, but...
He was just getting ready to turn and run when Misty grabbed his arm and started dragging him back towards the town they'd left a little while ago. "Come on, we gotta get married!"
"You're both a little young to get married," Brock insisted, blocking her path.
"Look, we're both sixteen now," she argued, "and I know we've loved each other for years. Haven't you, Ash? Haven't you loved me desperately since I insisted you owed me for my bike?"
Well, actually, deep down, he had, but...
"Excuse me," came a voice.
A beautiful woman with emerald-green double-layered hair and billowing robes that could've belonged to any number of local religions had arrived. "Priestess Jan of Delar City. I understand you wish to perform a marriage."
"Were you ever in Pallet Town?" asked a confused Ash. "I used to see you there."
"You must have seen my cousin. She's called Jan too. So are all my other cousins."
"I bet none of them are as pretty as you are," said Brock, who was obviously gaga again.
"Oh," murmured Ash, "like Officer Jenny, or..."
"Yes, we wish to perform a marriage," said Misty before he could finish, then grabbed Ash again and position them in front of her. "Two of us."
"All right. Your names, and names of the witness? Wait a minute..." She shook her head. Ash wasn't sure what that was about.
But Misty seemed to, saying, "You might be right. Let me check about the witnesses," and snatching up Ash's Pokedex.
"Um, Misty," started Ash, "somehow I don't think the Pokedex will tell us..."
"For two Pokemon trainers to marry," the Pokedex announced, "there must be two human witnesses and one Pokemon witness."
Misty glanced down first at Pikachu, who was standing next to Ash looking very small, then around where besides the three of them there was only Brock. "Okay, we need another human witness-I'll be right back!" And she zipped off at a probably absurd speed towards Deler City.
Priestess Jan shrugged and sat down. Brock joined her with a "So are you allowed to date?" Resignedly, Ash pulled out an empty pokeball and began to idly bat it back and forth between his hands.
A few minutes later, Misty burst back into the clearing, leading an excited Nurse Joy. "Two witnesses!" she crowed.
"All ri-AAAAAAA!!" Upon seeing who the second witness was, Priestess Jan screamed and started to run away.
"Wait, stop, where are you going?" Brock jumped up after her and tried to grab her robe, missing and flailing every which way.
But he got Jan to stop anyway, long enough to turn around, her face brimming with righteous indignation, and proclaim, "I will not stay in the presence of that woman for more than ten seconds!"
"Is that long enough to perform a marriage?" asked Misty.
"That's not very clergyish of you." Brock was somehow still flailing. "And why would anyone hate Nurse Joy?"
"Well," started Nurse Joy, "I did recently hear a weird story about my more mischieveous cousin in Blee City..."
"Trying to pin this one on your cousin, eh?" snarled Priestess Jan. "I won't fall for that!" And with that, she fled the clearing.
"Great!" sighed Misty. "Now we need another priestess!"
From behind the bush, Jessie was also sighing. "You really don't expect me to do this, do you?"
James was making the final adjustments to her robes. "This was your idea."
"No, it was yours."
"It was yours!"
"It was yours!"
Just before a war broke out, Meowth shoved Jessie out of the bushes, barely giving her time to pull her hood over. "Just go, you idiot!"
"Ow!" Five pairs of eyes turned to the robed and hooded figure that had just stumbled out of the bushes, before she stammered, "I am a priestess. I will marry you." She too could've belonged to any number of local religions.
"Oh, good," said Misty, not even asking how such a convenient person could suddenly appear out of the bushes. She started pulling Ash towards her.
"But..." Ash started. Now that the initial shock was wearing off, he was still feeling a bit reluctant, though he was also starting to wonder if marrying Misty was really such a bad idea.
"Ladies and gentlemen," the priestess began. "We are here today for the marriage of...oh wait, I totally have no idea what your names are, of course I don't, you'll have to..."
"Pika pika pika pika pika pika!" She was interrupted when Pikachu leapt up and began hysterically dancing back and forth.
"Is Pikachu trying to warn us about the priestess?" Brock suddenly wondered out loud. "Is he sensing her evil true identity?"
"Not necessarily," said Ash. "Looks more like he's sensed there's an earthquake about to hit."
"Of course it's an earthquake!" The priestess said way to hastily. "Come, we must get this wedding done before it hits!"
That made even Misty suspicious. "Wait a minute," she said. "Is this the part where the earthquake then doesn't hit, and we thus have a dramatic reveal?"
Then the ground began to violently shake.
Misty bolted over to Togepi and clutched him to her breast as the shaking tried to toss them about. Ash's head hit the ground, knocking him out. Nurse Joy and the priestess were thrown into the nearby lake. Brock grabbed Pikachu and stumbled to the center of the clearing, bracing himself. Officer Jenny's motobike rode through with Officer Jenny clinging onto it for dear life. Several of the pokeballs were thrown about and activated, so when the shaking stopped half a minute later, Venusaur, Seaking, Starmei, Golduck, Geodude, Arbok, and Ninetails were standing about in confusion.
Battered and bruised, Misty summoned Seaking back, then sat down and tried to shush the crying Togepi. Brock ran over to the lake, filled a bucket with water, and tossed it over Ash, who revived.
James burst out of the bushes. "Jessie, are you all right?"
Her hood and robes falling off, Jessie clambered out of the lake. "I'm fine. Even my hair's just fine, see?"
Meowth groaned. "But now you've given yourselves away."
"Hey!" yelled Ash. "That's Team Rocket!"
Jessie drew herself up to full height. "Prepare for trouble!"
"Make it double!"
"To protect the world from devastation!"
"To united all people within our nation!"
"To denounce the evils of truth and love!"
"To extend our reach to the stars above!"
"Jessie!"
"James!"
"Team Rocket blast off at the speed of light!"
"Surrender now, or prepare to fight!"
"Meowth, that's right!"
"Yeah, yeah, yeah," said Misty. "Could you please go away? Ash and I are trying to get married."
Priestess Jan, her face bruised and scratched and her hair disordered, peeked her head back. "Is she go-AAAAAAA!" She turned and ran back into the woods.
"No, you don't!" Misty yelled. "Starmei, fetch her back!"
As Starmei bolted off, Officer Jenny drove back into the clearing. "It was only a minor earthquake. Everyone all right?"
"Yeah, we're all fine," answered Misty. "Would you mind being a witness to our wedding?"
"In a bit. I have to check on the city." She zoomed out.
"Nurse Joy," said Misty, "I know you really want to see our wedding, but Priestess Jan won't perform in your presence. I'm really sorry, but you're going to have to go."
"Really?" Nurse Joy exploded. "Do I have to suffer every time one of my cousins misbehaves? Are you really kicking me out to replace me with members of Team Rocket? I don't think they can even count as witnesses in a marriage between Pokemon trainers..."
And she just ranted on and on. She ranted so much, in fact, that she ranted herself right out of the clearing, and just as Starmei returned with Priestess Jan. "Ah, she's gone, good. And we've got...Team Rocket members? I don't think they count..."
"Let's check the Pokedex first," Misty said. When it confirmed the fact, she said, "Surely there'll be someone nearby who can just..."
"Excuse me," came a new voice as a postman arrived, "but is there anyone here by the name of Ash Ketchum?"
"Um," Ash had gotten to his feet, but was still mostly dazed and wet. "That's me."
"There's a letter here from your mother."
"Hey, would you stay as a witness for our marriage?" Misty, of course.
"I am sorry, miss, but I must continue to deliver the mail." He left.
Ash opened the letter, and Misty and Brock peered over his shoulder as he read:
Dear Ash,
I'm very sorry I didn't writer earlier, but I've been very busy. You see, Professor Oak and I are getting married, and there's been so much to do. The wedding takes place a month from now. You, your fiancee Misty, and Brock should be getting invitations soon. Misty wrote to me about your impending wedding, of course. I've always thought her a good girl. I'd like, if you haven't gotten married yet, that you wait so I can be there. Congratulations!
Love,
Mom
"Mom and Professor Oak are getting married?" was Ash's first reaction. "But if mom and Professor Oak get married, then I'll be related to Gary!!!"
Misty's reaction meanwhile, was, "So she wants to see our wedding. Well, I guess we can postpone it." It was a pity Ash was too busy freaking out at the thought of being related to Garry to feel any relief at this.
She turned to Priestess Jan. "You can go. We've sent your money to you; you should find it waiting at home."
"Can I have a tip?" asked the Priestess.
Misty checked her pockets. "I'm sure Ash here doesn't have any cash. Do you, Brock?"
"No," said Brock, then walked up to Priestess Jan and said, "but if you go out to dinner with me, I'll pay."
"Well, I-AAAAAA!" She fled one final time as Nurse Joy ranted herself back into the clearing. "And then the trainer says, 'But Nurse Joooyyy...' in the most annoying whine possible. I wonder if that's how he got the Nidoking! He couldn't have trained it entirely himself, not as his age, but of course you can't accuse him of lying without getting in trouble. No, we're just magically supposed to..."
"Nurse Joy?" Officer Jenny had come back into the clearing and stopped alongside her.
"What?" she demanded of her, angry at being interrupted.
"The earthquake collapsed the Pokemon center. You're needed. I'll take you back."
"Oh, okay." Her anger gone, Nurse Joy climbed onto the motorcycle, and the two ladies rode out.
"Hey!" Ash yelled, noticing Team Rocket were getting a little too close to Pikachu, and James had summoned Wheezing. "Venusaur, get rid of them!"
"Saur!" Venusaur attacked, and it was not long at all before Team Rocket was blasting off again.
"Why don't we return to Pallet Town?" suggested Misty as she recalled Starmei and Golduck. "Ash and I can get married there, and we can help Mrs. Ketchum and Professor Oak get ready for their wedding."
"We can do that," said Brock and Ash too agreed, as they recalled their own Pokemon. It would take long enough to get to Pallet Town for Ash to decide if he wanted to marry Misty or not, and hopefully talk her out of it if he decided not to.
And so once again our heroes headed off, this time to Pallet Town, where much would be decided.