Izzy here, with my fanfic, "I'll Leave You a Phantom," a piece I'm hastily hammering out right after seeing episode 51 of Bells Hells, because of course that episode mainly left me in my Vaxleth feels and pain. Warning that this will contain not only spoilers and a major character death, but what is basically a suicide. My deepest respects to Marisha and everyine else.

I'll Leave You a Phantom

By Izzy

Keyleth would never knew where it was she lay, when the white light faded. Nor would she ever care.

She was vaguely aware, in those first moments, that whatever else was going on, the predator of the gods was not yet released, that she would feel it the moment they were. And perhaps they would be, in another minute or so; she could feel nothing beyond that one fact.

All she could think besides that was, I've gotten him destroyed. He still existed inside the Champion; he wouldn't have come otherwise. But now he won't, not even there. We won't ever see him again, even in death.

And she should've realized. It was one thing for the inexperienced Bells Hells to have been outwitted by the likes of Dal'eth, but she should've been smarter than that. Probably Vax should've, too, but she also should've realized he would never have let her die, no matter what it cost.

She was never going to be able to look Vex in the face again. If Vex was still alive at the end of this.

She heard a exclamation near her, and lifted her head to look around. The only other figure she could see in this strange landscape was Otohan Thull, standing there, actually looking confused.

And suddenly, Keyleth could see exactly what lay before her, for the rest of her life. If it wasn't over yet, if they had somehow done enough to make the key fail, or someone managed to stop it still, then perhaps this would be over for a while. But there would be more solstices, and at least one more apogee solstice, probably two, and she would have to do this again. And again. And again. Her entire life would be spent battling against evil fools, and even the successes would come at terrible prices, and she would have to see death and destruction that would never happen for the last time.

Or perhaps, of course, they were failing right now, and that all would just become nonstop, and if this second Calamity ever ended, she doubted she would live to see it.

Thull's eyes fell on her, and all Keyleth could think was, Fuck that. She had never before thought that the world had asked all it could of her, but well, it had now.

She still had some powerful spells left in her. Maybe she could take Thull with her. At the very least, she could probably leave her drained and damaged, make it harder for her to hurt any other Ashari or other allies that might have landed in the area, maybe even make it harder for her to survive.

Her final decision made, she felt oddly refreshed as she launched herself into her final battle.

It didn't take too long, in the end. The last thing she felt was the venom burning through her veins; no well-meaning attempts would tempt her to return.

And then she was gone from all that, floating in a place that brought back the vaguest of memories-she had probably been here and then forgotten about it the other time she'd been killed-and a familiar visage stood before her, no Champion with her now.

And it seemed that even when dead, Keyleth could still feel rage. "You're still here," she spat. "Got some special favor from Dal'eth in return for his needed sliver of divinity? Makes sense he'd talk to you." He actually could've succeeded at this point; her sense of that was now gone.

"I am no ally of his, if that is what you accuse me of," the goddess replied to her. "I did not even want him to go to you; I let him only because he so desperately wanted to. I would likely die with the other gods. But I suppose you do not care about that, do you? I know you've never cared for us. You were not there to save us for our own sake, I know that."

"I was not." Keyleth wasn't about to deny it. "Although I'm not completely indifferent to the fate of the gods, if only because there are some of them who are important to those I would see well and happy. But then again," and she felt her anger turn to cruelty in her smile, "you're not one of those anymore, are you?"

But the goddess said, "My Champion is not destroyed yet. It is possible to save him. Or even just save he who still is within him, although his chances are very low indeed if my Champion is lost."

And once again, Keyleth saw a future before her, and it wasn't too pleasant a one, either. One could even call it the second trap in a row she'd launched herself right into. She could almost feel it springing around her as she said, "If I can do anything to help...I can guess your price, but I'm out of reasons not to pay it. Even if it consumes me." She'd take oblivion over an eternity of knowing she'd let Vax be destroyed.

Besides, maybe if she became his replacement, he'd be free from the Matron's service. He could finally rest, if he wanted to. Or maybe she'd just have two Champions, but then at least they'd be together.

The touch of the Matron was cold, and Keyleth felt herself beginning to change. "Come then," her voice sounded within her. "We have very little time."

"I know," she said, and her voice was not her own. It was that of the newest angel of death.


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